You say I missed
some trains and that the people I knew moved on.
I live in a timeless dimension now,
but we exist
in the same space. It confuses me
when you count days.
I'm no longer sad I fell in,
It was a patch I had to walk through-
misty, unpleasant, but likely the best route
to here.
It was impossible to see,
and time halted inside entirely,
while it continued to tick for you.
I can't remember specifics now,
it has all been packed,
compacted
into a tiny marble.
A memory may swirl to the surface,
but I can't give you a sequence
or date- not even a rough summary.
Just a swirling chaos of events
I can't remember so well.
I know I'm not the same person now
coming out.
I've changed, I don't yet know how.
I've forgotten things I studied,
I've embraced instinct now.
"You were in there a while-
what happened?"
It's all still here.
I can break the marble
and let it all spread out clear
to view.
I'm sure it would shock you
for an afternoon.
I'm sure I would love
to feel understood,
But I won't break the marble.
It was only a moment for me.
A short nightmare, finished now.
I don't feel a second.
Isn't that a good thing
if it couldn't be helped?
I'm thankful.
Time is now irrelevant
in my reality.
Really is it fair to ask me
to give up such a gift?